In the Field of Flowers
by StoryGardener
Summary: Kirk survives a horrific crime by a sociopath, Royal Faradan. When the latter is caught, the Captain is abducted by Faradan's family to be exchanged. Kirk must navigate his trauma and the debilitating effects of their transporter to make it. No slash.
1. Chapter 1

**In the Field of Flowers**

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine. I just get to play with them like with action figures. Complete but might get a rewrite when I feel up to it. I love comments and critiques: keep them coming!

**Chapter 1**

_God, please, no._

He was on his stomach on the rocky ground again. The left side of his face was pressed into the gritty soil. His right temple burned with the cold steel of the rifle nozzle. He attempted one more breath. His chest gurgled with blood - he could _smell _it.

A foot away Tulok lay. The boy was looking straight through him with dreamy eyes.

"Why?" he whispered.

The man towering over him laughed and pulled the trigger.

_Four in the Field._

He jerked awake. Swore out loud. Touched the scar that began at his temple and disappeared into his hair. He didn't want it removed. It was a declaration that he had been through this and survived.

He sat up, untangled himself from the sweaty sheets and swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"I lived, Tulok," he said to the boy standing in the corner of his room.

The child gazed, dreamily, right through him.

"I know, I know," he said, frowning a little, "I still owe you that popsicle."

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"So, Director Shore, do you think he is ready for command?" asked Faulk.

"Physically he is entirely healed, Admiral," smiled Shore. "Psychologically… this kind of trauma will be with him his entire life. But knowing Jim Kirk, he will put it to good use, just as he has always done. I've never known a man who could put fear and anger to such good use."

The Admiral said nothing.

"So, yes, he _is_ ready for command," added Shore victoriously.

Faulk appeared unmoved.

"And what do you think, Doctor?" he asked of Leonard McCoy.

McCoy was not as chipper as Shore. His good colleague was the director of a civilian healing institute, not a Starfleet doctor. He had very little experience with Admirals and their agendas, and the news they brought, always bad. This was no exception.

Also, he had carefully read the reports on the Captain's progress as they had come in. He had combed through them again upon being summoned. It was no surprise to him that Shore had been taken in by the Captain's charm and composure. But McCoy knew better. There had been no cathartic moment. Jim's trauma was as yet unresolved and it made McCoy uneasy.

But only one answer was expected of him, and it was the answer he would give, regardless.

"I concur with Director Shore, Admiral."

What really worried McCoy was what was coming next.

"Good," said Faulk, not releasing the Doctor from the stern gaze of his pale grey eyes. "And do you think he is ready for _this_?"

McCoy inhaled sharply and considered for the duration of the oxygen supply. He glanced at Spock, who stood by, ramrod straight, hands clasped behind his back. Did McCoy see a flicker of disquiet there?

"Tell me, Admiral," he said finally, meeting Faulk's gaze with his own blue steel resolve, "does he have a choice?"

The Admiral's eyes softened a little. He sighed.

"No," he admitted. "No, he doesn't."

000000

Probably it was the anticipation of being released and rejoining his crew that had brought on the nightmare. He hadn't had it in over a week now. He wondered if he should tell Shore, but doubted he could do so in full confidentiality. He didn't want to blemish his release form. He shrugged, not quite succeeding to put it out of his mind.

The sight that welcomed him when he rounded the corner did that for him. It had already drawn a crowd to the large window upon space.

"That's his ship, you know!" a gaunt, hawk-nosed man on crutches was informing another patient.

The man turned, saw Kirk and beamed happily.

"You're going home, Jim! Or rather your home came to _you_!"

Kirk joined them at the window.

There she was, the _Enterprise_, his ship. They must have fixed her up after her battle with the Klingons. A battle he had missed out on. Three months now, was it? It seemed like three years. His heart had ached for this day. She would always be his home, and he swore he would never leave her again.

He threw a gentle arm around his friend's shoulder.

"Goodbye, Georgie, I hope you get out of here soon too."

They shook hands and he addressed the crowd.

"I hope that for all of you, that you may go home, or make a home, and find happiness."

To his surprise, Georgie and all the other patients assembled there – civilians, each and every one of them – stood to attention.

"Your crew salutes you, Captain Kirk," said Georgie, deftly balancing on his crutches.

Kirk smiled and saluted them back. He took one last drought of the wonderful sight out of the window, and continued his headlong dash to the Director's office.

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"Jim!" Shore jumped up from behind his desk. "Glad you could make it."

McCoy too rose from his seat. His heart leapt, then stuttered and sank. Kirk had broken into a grin and started moving towards him and Spock, but the Doctor's face must have given something away. The grin disappeared and a sudden fear swept the keen, hazel eyes. McCoy could read the alarm on his paling face:

_I'm not going to be released?_

Then Kirk spotted the Admiral and stopped in his tracks altogether.

McCoy flinched inwardly at his friend's transformation.

_He knows._

"At ease, Jim," said Faulk.

Kirk stayed as he was.

"Sit down, Captain," Faulk added with a mixture of pity and alarm.

Kirk glanced at McCoy again. The realization was painfully clear on his face. But there was nothing McCoy could do or say to undo it. Jim turned to Faulk and said, almost breathlessly,

"You got him."

For a moment McCoy thought the Captain was going to have that missing cathartic moment right then and there. And surely he would have understood, for this was not how they were supposed to welcome Jim back.

The Doctor thought back to when they dropped him off here, three months ago. He was still dealing with feelings of guilt over that. Jim was _his_ patient, barely out of emergency surgery, not out of the woods yet. But the _Enterprise_ had been called to the front, and carrying a half-dead Captain into the fray was not advised. McCoy had let him go.

He had followed the reports and soon breathed easier, on most accounts. Jim had survived, was recovering. He was dealing, to a certain extent, with the horror and with the guilt and anger at not being there to guide his ship and crew through their peril. The Doctor had often looked around his sickbay, crowded with the wounded, the dying and the dead, and regretted that none of this was being reported to the patient, and that therefore the patient would imagine even worse. But when it was clear that they would win the battle, McCoy had thought that Jim would be able to deal with this as well. They would survive, get their Captain back, and move on…

Never had he imagined that the horror of the Field of Flowers would catch up with them so soon.

"We do," said Faulk. "We caught him on the Rigelian border. I think you should sit down now, Jim."

Kirk nodded and practically collapsed onto the nearest bench. McCoy finally broke his paralysis and went to sit next to him. He took Kirk's hand, caught his eye, smiled and said,

"It's good to see you again, Jim."

For a second the Captain just stared at him. He did not conceal the shock, the questions of what would happen now. Then his eyes focused, and briefly filled with a smile, and McCoy proudly witnessed the Captain pull himself together.

Kirk turned back to the Admiral with at least the semblance of the old confidence.

"How did it happen?" he demanded.

"It was a fluke, really," said Faulk, visibly relieved. "He got into a brawl at an outpost and was arrested. His brothers were with him, but they probably thought it a joke to let him sleep it off in jail for a night. One of the jailors recognized him and for a considerable bribe contacted Starfleet. We immediately retrieved him, in the utmost secret. He is in transit to Azara as we speak, in a small cargo vessel. Even I don't know its name or route. They won't be able to recover him."

"The Azarans will put him to trial," Kirk stated. "And they need me to testify."

"Yes. The children are too young, too traumatized. The Azarans won't put them through the ordeal of a trial. Anyway, their testimony would be shredded by the defense."

"Who would defend such a man?" McCoy blurted out.

"The Azarans are meticulous in their justice," Spock said. They were the first words he had uttered, and he directed them to the Captain. "They will give him a fair trial with a fair defense."

Kirk acknowledged Spock's contribution with a slight nod.

"But once convicted," continued Faulk, "they will be ruthless. Children as the bearers of new life are sacred to the Azarans. They reserve the death penalty exclusively for those who hurt or kill children. Listen, Jim, they have made it clear that they do not want to force you. You are a hero to them. If you have any reservations they will not insist. They will leave him to the Federation to stand trial for his other crimes. It is entirely up to you."

McCoy bristled at that. Of course Jim had no choice.

"I'll testify," said Kirk softly, simply.

"I knew you would," said Faulk. "So I've already set the wheels in motion. Faradan won't be pursuing his son. He knows he's already off the radar. He'll be after _you _now. We'll follow the same procedure. The _Enterprise _will take you to a trading post. There you will transfer to one of many trade vessels. It will get you to Azara. The trial might take a while, but it will bring closure for so many."

Kirk was looking at Faulk as if he had trouble understanding what the Admiral had just said. McCoy felt for him. And really, were any of them ready for this? Jim had battled to return to the _Enterprise _as her Captain, and the crew of the _Enterprise_ had battled to get back to him. No sooner were they reunited and they had to part again.

But McCoy could see the growing resolve in his Captain. Kirk rose with that old catlike ease, stood straight-backed, proud-shouldered, and announced softly, as if to himself,

"Let's put the bastard to trial."

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"Mary Mother of Jesus," the Doctor whispered.

Spock had no phrase in his own language that could have expressed his feelings of helplessness and rage.

He, McCoy and the rest of the Federation party had been in the city when this horror occurred. The Captain had just concluded three days of negotiations for the Azarans' help against the Klingons and had welcomed a break. He had accepted Ms. Risa's invitation to join her and her class on an outing to the Flower Field. When the message came, Spock and McCoy had jumped into the shuttle and flown over immediately.

To this. This field of intensely red flowers on waist-high stalks, graciously nodding in the breeze. This field of children lying dead among the flowers.

Spock slammed down on his emotions. He left the four children to the Azaran medical team and joined the crew in the field. Soon he spotted a yellow form that was out of place here and waded through the flowers towards it. It was the teacher. She was lying on her side in the grass, as if she had fallen asleep there, but her yellow silk tunic was drenched in blood.

"Over here!" he called out.

He knelt and gently closed her staring eyes. Then he saw that she was holding a small hand. He parted the stalks. The child too had been shot dead. Spock was glad that her face was turned away from him.

"Life sign!" he heard Sulu yell. "Over there!"

Spock sprang up and aimed his tricorder. Unmistakably human, very faint, five hundred meters away on a rocky outcrop. He overtook Sulu in a second.

The Captain was there, lying on his stomach, his head turned to the side facing the boy whom Spock recognized as Tulok. The boy's eyes were open, and Spock saw death in them. The Captain's eyes were closed. The exit wound in his back, the crushed hole in his head and the blood that was everywhere told Spock that he was dead too. But the tricorder insisted that he was still, though only barely alive.

Spock knelt and touched the Captain's neck with trembling fingers. There it was, a mere quiver in the jugular vein.

_Movement, life, hope._

McCoy arrived and fell to his knees, throwing up his hands, groaning with hope and despair.

Spock touched his communicator.

"Mr. Scott," he called, his voice barely controlled. "Do you have a lock on the Doctor?"

"I do, Mister Spock," came Scott's voice.

"The Captain is right next to him, can you read him?"

"I've got him!" Scotty yelled.

"Beam them directly to Sickbay, Mister Scott."

And so the Captain left Azara's Field of Blood, with a bullet in his brain and a nightmare in his soul.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The Captain stepped off the transporter platform and clasped hands with the Chief Engineer, who had transported them in.

"Scotty, good to be back!"

"Aye, Sir," Scott beamed, "and good to have ye back, Sir!"

Kirk strode out of the room, Spock and Scott on his heels. He glanced back at the two blue-skinned giants sent along by Admiral Faulk.

"Are they really necessary, Spock?" he whispered. The Sarans, experts in security, had started shadowing his every move since the briefing in the Director's office. "Surely the crew can handle it now?"

"The crew is still incomplete, Captain," Spock stated. "We suffered losses in the battle with the Klingons, especially among Security."

Kirk swore under his breath. He had been allowed only the most rudimentary reports of what had happened on the front lines while he lay in a coma at the Institute. Even now all he knew was that the Klingon renegades had been defeated and the peace restored, and that the _Enterprise _had come out fairly well.

"Fairly well" had not been specified. "Fairly well" was starting to sound more ominous than he had imagined.

"I want a full briefing right away," he said, picking up his pace.

"All chief personnel is already assembled, Captain."

The two security guards followed the Captain, his First and his Chief Engineer to the Briefing Room.

000000

"Come," Kirk called.

McCoy let Spock precede him into the Captain's quarters so he could give the sour-faced Sarans one last blistering look.

"They'd station themselves _inside_ if I'd let them," Kirk said, seeing the Doctor's scowl.

"Surely you're safe on board the _Enterprise_!" McCoy grumbled.

"We-ell," Kirk drawled. He slumped in his chair, looking exhausted. The briefing had been rough on him and so had his first shift on the Bridge, seeing the gaps in his crew, dealing with the see-saw of welcome and loss. "It's good sense to have them here, Bones. It's not common knowledge, but the fact is that the Faradan utilize a Morrow transporter."

"Morrow?" asked McCoy. It rang a bell.

Kirk remained silent, so Spock obliged.

"In the mid 22nd century, Dr. Christopher Morrow devised a new way of teleporting living cells. In simple terms, it works like the transporter we use today, but during dematerialization the body is additionally flooded with Morrow Radicals, a type of energy that instantly sends cells into a state of super-quantum metabolism."

McCoy whistled softly.

"So, basically, it sets the body _on fire_?"

"In a sense, Doctor," Spock answered. He was not impressed by McCoy's construal and lifted an eyebrow to show as much. "The dematerialized energy pattern thus achieved is very malleable and portable. It can be transported at great speed, in fact, nearly instantaneously, as well as across greater distances and through many more types of shields than our own transporter system."

"It comes at a great price, though, for humanoids," Kirk put in wearily.

"Indeed, Captain," Spock acknowledged. "You see, Doctor, most humanoid physiology cannot survive this process. The problem is not the actual metabolic acceleration, which only occurs under dematerialized conditions, but its byproduct."

"I see," McCoy put in – now this was _his_ field of expertise. "Our cells metabolize by a chemical reaction that transfers electrons from one substance to an oxidizing agent. This reshuffling of electrons results in Reactive Oxygen Metabolites or ROM, oxygen molecules with an unpaired electron. These unstable ROM attack the nearest molecules to steal their electrons. This would result in a cascade if the body didn't put the brake on with anti-oxidants, which neutralize the ROM. But with that rate of metabolic rate… " He paused, shaking his head at the sheer folly of it. "Our bodies can't produce the amount of antioxidants to stop the chain reaction of so much excess oxygen. The inflammation alone… My God, it really _is_ setting the body on fire! Who would enter such a machine!"

"Dr. Morrow himself, Doctor. He found a way to counter the firestorm. You yourself have pointed to the solution: anti-oxidants. Simultaneously with the Morrow Radicals, he injected himself with a high dose of oxalica."

"Oxalica!" McCoy cried out. "Who in their right mind-" He stopped himself. "Ah," he murmured, "now it all makes sense."

"By itself," Spock continued unperturbed, "the required dose of oxalica would as lethal as the ROM resulting from the flood of Morrow Radicals. But as they are administered together, they immediately start neutralizing each other. The whole point is to dematerialize and teleport at the exact instant when the ROM fire burns at its brightest, right before the oxalica douses it. However, because a small excess of ROM is often lethal, and a small excess of oxalica is not, and because living bodies are so complex and ever changing, and because of several uncertainty principles, it is always wise to _over_dose, with as small a margin as can be estimated, on oxalica."

"And oxalica in the body does not get neutralized," McCoy added. "And it is highly addictive. _And _even a small accumulation will damage certain centers in the brain, most notably the right temporo-parietal junction Gyrus."

"The moral center of the brain," Spock concluded.

Finally it was Kirk who broke the silence.

"That's why the Faradan are psychotic, Bones. They've been using that thing for over five years now. At first their crimes were minor, but as the Morrow transporter allowed them to penetrate and extract themselves from the most secure situations, they began to work on an ever larger scale. Their reliance on oxalica in the meantime also eroded their sense of right and wrong, their sense of _proportion_. They became ruthless, fearless, and uncatchable."

"But can they board the _Enterprise_?" McCoy asked with sudden alarm.

"Chief Engineer Scott and myself have modified the shields to virtually eliminate that possibility," Spock said.

"'Virtually'?" McCoy repeated. "What do you mean, '_virtually'_?"

"The Morrow transporter can take advantage of the relative slowness of the waves of our shields. Our modification was simply to speed up these waves. Still, there are gaps, and their system seems highly refined and could take advantage of them. Speeding up the shields also takes a lot of energy. That is why the _Enterprise _cannot safely bring the Captain to Azara."

"As long as they know where I am," Jim sighed, rising tiredly from his chair, "there is a chance that they get to me. And Faradan will take that chance. The sooner I get off the _Enterprise_ and disappear into a crowd, the better."

McCoy noticed how the Captain leaned on his desk.

"You're exhausted, Jim. We reach the base in seven hours. You should get some sleep."

"I think I will, Bones. I'd hoped to catch up a bit more, friends, but it seems we'll have to postpone the real homecoming, and who knows for how long."

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Spock pushed the button on the Captain's chair.

"Mr. Scott? Can we go to Warp Five?"

"Aye, _nay_, Mr. Spock," came Scott's voice. He sounded put out. "This is as fast as she'll go what with the shields taking up so much power."

Spock sighed.

"Understood, Mr. Scott."

He could not relax. He did not like the Captain's vulnerability, on board his own ship at that. He liked even less the sketchy instructions on how to proceed when they reached the trading post. He understood the need for secrecy, but was piqued that Starfleet had not included him in the operation of getting the Captain undercover and safely on his way to Azara.

"Mister Spock!" Sulu burst out. "Off the starboard bough!"

Spock too had seen the small vessel appear, _instantly_, on the screen.

Quick as a flash the view screen burst into a bright yellow light and the _Enterprise _shuddered.

"Red alert!" Spock yelled. "Phasers, _now_!"

Chekov pushed the buttons.

The spread hit the vessel, but its shields held.

"Again, Mr. Chekhov," Spock ordered. "Security, to the Captain's quarters!"

The second volley missed their target, because it was gone.

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Kirk had always been a light sleeper. Even exhausted, his brain registered the shudder at the periphery of his ship and the more proximate disturbance of the air in his cabin. He opened his eyes to see a hand come down on his mouth. More hands pinned him to his bunk. He got a sound out – knowing the Sarans would hear it – and just about registered the whine of Red Alert when a hypo hissed at his neck. His vision instantly exploded in a shower of green dust. His entire body and in it each nerve, each cell tightened like a rope suddenly pulled taut.

He took a ragged breath to weather the pain and disorientation. He was still being held down. His vision was clouded but knew he was no longer on the _Enterprise_, because a different alarm was sounding.

"Jumping again," she said and he recognized her voice. The hypo hissed.

Again that tension, that _torque_, and the rope snapped.

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Spock arrived at the Captain's cabin at the same time as McCoy.

"We heard him, Mister Spock," said one of the Sarans in his clipped accent. He was visibly shaken. "We ran in just as the Red Alert sounded. They were already transporting out. We dared not fire. We could have hit Captain Kirk."

Spock acknowledged the report with a curt nod. He looked at the bed, empty but for the twisted sheets.

"What happened, Spock?" asked McCoy, his eyes wide with shock.

"They improved their technology, Doctor. The Faradan. They disrupted our shields with a phaser burst. We fired back, but their shields held. It took only a second but it was sufficient for them to take the Captain. Then they jumped their entire vessel."

"Jumped their _vessel_?"

Spock was too involved in figuring out the implications. His silence proved too much for the Doctor. McCoy lurched toward the desk chair and fell into it.

"But, will they kill him, Spock? Why take him, not _kill_ him?"

"Killing the Captain would only eliminate one witness of one of their crimes – their most heinous one, but not the only one that would get Faradan the death penalty. They want to get their son and brother back, so they will want to trade the Captain. They also know that James Kirk is a hero in Azara, and that the Azarans will not hesitate to complete such a trade-"

"-Spock," McCoy interrupted. "The Morrow transport! They've injected Jim with oxalica!"

"Yes. _Twice_, Doctor," said Spock, and though his voice gave the impression of impassivity, he felt miserable inside. "I suggest you immediately start research on how to counteract oxalica addiction. Mister Scott and I will investigate this new technology that allows an entire vessel to be transported from, apparently, its own location."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Kirk regained consciousness in a small medical bay. He was lying on an observation biobed, still in his sleeping clothes, drenched with sweat. A quick glance confirmed that the stinging sensation in the back of his right hand was caused by an IV needle. A quick pull confirmed that his wrists and ankles were bound.

He was about to give the room a furtive exam when he tensed and moaned softly. Beads of sweat swelled on his forehead. It was all he could do to keep control over his breathing.

"There are two possible side effects," Jody said matter-of-factly, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "The grandmother of all headaches, and the kind of nausea we'd get on that roller coaster ride on Teerna —what was it called again? Something Vortex."

"Galactic Vortex," he mumbled through his pain.

"That's it! Which one do you have?"

"Both," he groaned. He was struggling to breathe slowly and as shallowly as he could, but even this seemed to further disturb the already sloshing cesspool in his stomach. He barely heard her gentle response through the pounding in his head.

"We take painkillers for the headache and tablets for the nausea, but Faradan forbade me to give them to you. Sorry."

Kirk made the effort to focus on her. He considered her for a second or two. She was still the beautiful Jody Faradan, nee Audrey, looking down on him with what seemed like a genuinely apologetic smile. But the bright lights in the room made him extra dizzy so he closed his eyes again, tensing his body against another wave of nausea so that his knuckles turned white.

He heard the door open, but kept his eyes closed.

_Focus, focus._

"What do you say to that, Billy?" came a man's voice. "A double jump for his Morrow initiation! Consider it a privilege, Jim."

Kirk didn't have to open his eyes to know that the man who had spoken was Aaron Faradan, the middle brother. Billy was the youngest brother and the most feral man Kirk had ever come in contact with. In his state he was defenseless against them, but he'd be damned if he opened his eyes and show his fear. Also, he needed desperately to concentrate on riding the wave of nausea.

Someone grabbed his right hand and started cruelly twisting the needle in it. He cried out, his eyes flew open and he pulled on the restraints that tied his hands.

"Let go of him!" Jody ordered.

He was released, but it was too late. His precarious balance had given away and the bile hit his throat. He swallowed frantically.

"It's best if you let it out, Jim," Jody said.

Kirk raised himself up on his elbows and vomited stomach acid into the pan she was holding ready. When he was finally done, he fell back on the hard bed, heaving air, seeing stars. The mocking laughter was a distant din, but it stung him nevertheless.

And then he did it. He managed to modify his painful breathing into laughter just as malicious as his assailants'.

"That must be snot-nosed Billy," he chuckled hoarsely, trying to discern the younger man through a haze of tears, "who never needed oxalica to turn him into a coward!"

A fist connected with his face and sent him back into merciful oblivion.

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_Great_.

His head now hurt twice as much as before and he seemed to suffer from some kind of tunnel vision. Still, the nausea had abated considerably, and when he flexed his pounding hand he winced, but there seemed to be no broken bones. The IV had been replaced.

He turned his head to the side, shifting the end of the tunnel from the ceiling to the wall next to his bed.

There stood Tulok.

Kirk smiled and winked at the impassive child.

He jumped a bit when Jody appeared in front of the boy.

"What are you doing?" she asked softly, a look of gentle bewilderment on her face.

She moved aside. Tulok was gone.

"Jody," he whispered.

"They won't come back," she said. "This is my sickbay and I'm the boss here."

"I don't doubt it," Kirk said, a little smile curling his lips.

"I know what you're thinking, Jim," she warned, and the coldness in her voice and her eyes withered his smile. "You think that it's still the same Jody you knew twenty years ago. But I'm not. I'm _not_."

She looked away from his penetrating stare.

But she was still the only girl among the boys, the one who kept the pack together through tension and attraction. Kirk remembered that day on Teerna. Jody, excruciatingly sexy in a summer dress and a cowboy hat, was leaning with her back against the chain link fence, watching the writhing contraption in front of them with intense excitement.

"Who's with me?" she asked at last.

Royal, on the other side of her, jumped and hooted. He would always be with her.

Jody ignored him.

"Jim?" she asked.

"Sure," he said with a smirk.

"You stay, now, Aaron," she said to the older brother, who had a fear of heights, "and keep an eye on Billy here".

She pushed off against the fence and pinched Aaron's cheek, winked at Billy. Then she hooked an arm into Kirk's and Royal's arms and, sandwiched tightly between them, pulled them to the ticket booth.

How they had all loved her. How carefree he had been, whereas she was already fearlessly playing the odds to maintain her own position of power. Flirting with all of them, enough to keep them devoted to her, but not enough to lose the trust of Royal, who beat up any man who touched her, except his adopted brother and greatest rival, Jim Kirk.

"How did it come to this?" Kirk asked softly of her stern profile.

She turned back to him and said bitterly,

"You know how it came to this! You left us, you traitor!"

Kirk frowned.

"There was no reason for me to stay," he said simply.

"Was _I _not reason enough?"

"You? You were in love with Royal! You made that perfectly clear by marrying him."

"Ugh!" she spat. She started to turn and took a step, ready to bolt. But then she stopped and composed herself. With a heavy sigh she turned again and sat down on the bed.

"If you had stayed with us, you would have steered us away from this, this madness."

"I doubt that," Kirk said. "I was young and impressionable. Your father and your husband were my heroes. I don't know if I would have been able to assert myself."

"Oh, come on! You, the great Captain Kirk, strong-willed though some would say just stubborn! And always so damn wholesome, so damn _good_. You kept even Billy out of the worst of trouble."

"Which made me the perfect challenge. If they could turn me, what could they not do? No, Jody, I stayed partly because I admired Faradan and Royal – their crimes still seemed noble back then – but mostly because I was in love with _you_, and I got away partly by accident but mostly because you chose Royal."

"_Royal_," she repeated the name, pronouncing it like it was a bittersweet venom in her mouth.

"And you-you too, Jody?" Kirk now pleaded. "Seeing you now, hearing what you are saying, I can't believe it."

She was shaking her head.

"Faradan and I stay on board. It's the boys who jump in and out. We rarely jump the ship. So we've been less exposed."

"Then why didn't _you_ do something?"

"They're addicted, Jim. It got out of control before we knew it. Faradan is close to losing control over Aaron and Billy. He has already lost Royal. _I _have lost Royal. They _need_ the jumps. Oxalica is the greatest part of their souls now."

"Then leave," Kirk said. "_Leave with me_."

Jody stared at him, and he knew he had made the wrong move.

"But I still love him, Jim," she retorted, shocked at his suggestion. "And I want him back!"

His heart broke to see that her soul too had been eaten. But how could it not? Even with less exposure, over five years it would have accumulated and affected her brain.

His head hurt and he closed his eyes to get away from the sight of her.

"Anyway," she said, in a tone that turned the sweat on his body cold, "Faradan wants to see you. I'll let them know you're awake."

She pulled the IV out of his hand, none too gently.

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Kirk steeled himself when Billy and Aaron loosened the straps around his wrists. He was ready to do at least somedamage. But they were ahead of him. They pulled him up and immediately tied his elbows tightly behind his back. Only then did they undo the ankle restraints. When they pulled him off the bed his wasted adrenaline came in handy as it kept his knees from buckling and surrendering him to the deck. He swayed a little, the room spinning, but he managed to stay upright.

"Well done," Aaron laughed. Aaron had always been the light-hearted one among the brothers. "Come!"

They held him by the upper arms and half shoved, half carried him into a corridor. He concentrated, trying to memorize the route and gauge the size and type of the vessel. It was run-down, nothing like the tidy sickbay he had just left_. _The corridors were crowded with cables and equipment parts, and he could hear the drip of fluids leaking. There were others on board, not just the family. He didn't actually see anyone else, but he felt their presence. A small, crowded ship.

_The others from the Field must be here._

A door slid open onto an empty room.

There stood William Faradan.

The brothers brought him face to face with the man he had once admired, even considered a father, but who now filled him with hatred and disgust.

Kirk had known Faradan as a strong and burly man and was surprised that his opponent was no longer as towering as he used to be. Then he checked himself. He was also no longer a teenaged kid. He drew himself up, and though he didn't reach Faradan's height, he managed to project his confidence and strength.

"Ah," said the older man, noticing. "The great Captain Kirk! I am honored, _Sir_." He laughed. "We have followed your career, Jimmy, it's impressive. But I can never stop thinking, what a life you would have had had you stayed with _us_. You would have been a _ruler_ of the Universe, Jim!"

"Don't flatter yourself," Kirk spat, earning himself a punch in the ribs from Billy.

"Billy, _Billy_!" Faradan warned, and Kirk – bent double, trying to keep his footing - could just catch the hint of urgency in the seemingly playful warning.

_Can he still control them?_

He suddenly felt very vulnerable, his arms tied behind his back, exposed and exhausted. He could _feel_ the aggression coming off Billy, like an electric field. It made his hair stand on end, chilled the sweat on his back.

But Billy stepped back.

Faradan now stepped forward and grasped Kirk's shoulders to pull him upright. Kirk tried to draw away, but he was too weak and unbalanced, and then he realized Faradan was simply holding him up while he recovered. So he let him and concentrated on catching his breath.

"There now," Faradan soothed.

Despite himself, somehow, Kirk was touched.

When he had recovered, Faradan let go of him and stood for a moment, very close, regarding Kirk with an appreciative smile. Kirk met his gaze steadily. He had no idea what would happen next and was content to just wait for it.

"I heard," Faradan began, and his smile became calculated, and his voice swelled with a terrible pride, "that my Royal put a bullet in your brain."

He reached out and touched the scar on Kirk's temple.

The gesture set off an explosion in Kirk's head. Faradan might as well have pulled the trigger again.

"Does it make you proud," he heard himself shout, knowing he was being baited but unable to control himself, "that your son butchered ten children and their teacher, shot them down in cold blood!"

Then Faradan smiled. And Kirk lost it. He staggered again, this time under the onslaught of his pent up rage. His eyes filled with tears, and he yelled,

"_Monsters, monsters, every one of you_! Cowards! Bastards!"

And on and on he roared, falling to his knees, doubling over, and finally weeping like a child.

000000

To his knowledge no one had mocked him, but his shame was complete. To have broken down at the least provocation and shown his weakest self to his enemy was against everything he believed in. Yet here he was, collapsed on his knees, gasping for breath, his shirt and trousers soaked with snot, tears and sweat, his breath snagging in his burning throat.

The thought of Tulok nearly made him cry again, but he set his jaw and looked up.

He was alone in the room with Faradan, who stood a few feet away, regarding him with something like admiration or respect.

"I am sorry," said the older man. "It comes over me sometimes… But I want you to know that I loved you as a son."

He was completely sincere. Kirk stayed as he was, afraid to disturb the moment.

"And you can be sure that when I make this exchange, Jimmy…" Faradan hesitated, then went on in a barely audible whisper, "when I make this exchange, I will be poorer because of it."

The two men regarded one another, the younger one in shock, the other in deep mourning.

Finally Faradan broke the spell. He stepped forward and gently helped Kirk to his feet. The Captain was utterly depleted and could barely stand. Faradan held him up and led him back to the sickbay, where he and Jody undid his elbow restraints, laid him back down on the bed, and replaced the straps on his wrists and ankles. But of the latter he felt nothing.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

McCoy had to admit it, he felt for Faulk. The man's face on the screen reflected the same haggard worry that he felt himself. It was thirty-five hours since Jim's abduction, and William Faradan had finally made contact.

"As expected he wants to exchange Jim for Royal. The Azaran people immediately made it known to us that they will make this exchange happen, with or without the Federation's blessing. We have contacted all the other nations that want to prosecute Faradan, and they have all agreed to let him go in return for your Captain. We await further instructions from Faradan. Faulk out."

McCoy realized he was grinding his teeth and consciously opened his mouth to move his stiff jaw. He was trying to fight that treacherous feeling of hope that was growing in him.

"Remarkable," Spock said. "It is not Federation policy to give in to such demands."

McCoy was too tired to explode in his usual righteous indignation. He had been working on oxalica addiction almost nonstop, driven by the sight of Royal Faradan in his Azaran cell, fighting his straight jacket, howling like a crazed beast as his brain demanded the oxalica it had come to rely on. He had made no headway. Neither, to the best of his knowledge, had Spock and Mister Scott.

"I assume it is for the Azarans as it is for me, Spock," he said, "simply the choice between the death of an evil man and the life of a good man."

"You make it sound so logical, Doctor," Spock said. Was that a smile on his pale face? If it was, it was soon concealed. The Vulcan looked away, considered something, and for his conclusion merely gave a small nod.

0000000

Risa was laughing out loud, peals of laughter clear as a bell. She was sitting up on her knees, trying to tie back her long blonde hair, but the breeze toyed with it mercilessly, whipping it into her face and back again. For Kirk, lying in the grass, looking up at her, that slender figure, her slim arms thrown up and the cloud of waving hair would forever be part of the Field of Flowers alive with the wind and the laughter of children.

"Ooph," Risa burst out as she finally sat down on her ankles, her hair clip askew but doing a reasonable job of holding back all but the wisps around her forehead. "There!" she added for good measure.

The Captain laughed and touched her elbow, and she gave him a shocked look.

"Why, Captain," she breathed, "not near the children!"

Kirk pulled his hand back as if it had touched fire. He realized he really didn't know Azaran customs that well.

But Risa actually winked.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he vowed with a sigh of relief.

He rose and Risa looked up at him questioning. How clearly the Azarans wore their feelings on their faces, thought Kirk. How transparent they were, and beautiful, and so very carefree.

"I'm going to the _Copernicus_ to get the picnic," he explained.

"Take Tulok with you," Risa said.

The boy's head immediately popped up out of the grasses, not ten feet away. Risa laughed at Kirk's surprise. Tulok approached sheepishly and they set off.

They had come with two shuttles, Risa with her twenty-two children in the school's large shuttle, and Kirk with the two older boys in the _Copernicus_.

Kirk and Tulok walked past the school shuttle, the boy pretending not to have to make an effort to keep up with the Starfleet Captain's long strides. Tulok was different from all of them, a loner, a worrier. Kirk was content not to talk. He was wrapped up in his relief to have escaped the formal affair in the city, a half hour's flight away. All the talk there was of a notorious criminal who was supposed to be running amok in the solar system.

What was his name, Kirk had asked.

Faradan. Royal Faradan.

He had blanched. All sense of achievement at gaining the Azarans' support and optimism about the pending battle with the Klingons had left him. McCoy had noticed, of course, but to Kirk's relief Risa had invited him to come along to the Field of Flowers before the good Doctor had had a chance to ask.

Now here he was, far away from intergalactic strife and ghosts from the past, and the grasses along his path were alive with giggles. Kirk pretended not to notice. Suddenly a group of children rushed him, yelling at the tops of their little voices. Kirk feigned surprise and put up a brave fight, but soon they had brought him down on his knees. Then, with a great thud and a groan, he went sprawling on the soft, springy ground. Howling with laughter, they clambered over him, twenty Lilliputters holding down Gulliver.

"No, no tickling," he roared, "it's the worst torture!"

"Children!"

One word from Risa – gentle and laced with humor, yet firm - was enough. As soon as they had come, the children were gone, now by mere giggles in the grass.

Kirk cleared his throat and stood, blushing a little as he wiped the bright red pollen off his uniform.

"And you, _Captain_ Kirk," scolded the schoolmarm, "you are the biggest child of them all!"

Kirk beamed at Tulok, who stood to the side with a hint of disdain on his pale face. Kirk sighed. The boy took himself too seriously. Or rather, took _him_ too seriously. With a nod at Tulok they again set out toward the _Copernicus_.

"So, Master Tulok," said Kirk sternly as they started climbing the small hill where the shuttle was parked. "Tell me, what is your absolute favorite thing?"

"Snow," the boy said without hesitation.

Kirk was taken by surprise.

"Azara doesn't have snow, does it?" he ventured.

Maybe it did? He knew the planet was like Earth in many ways, but it was closer to its sun. The equator was unlivable, the poles the only inhabited regions, and without any icecaps that he had noticed.

"We made snow in school," said Tulok. "I understand, Captain Kirk," he added gravely, "that you _eat _snow, on Earth?"

Kirk had to think for a moment.

"Oh? Popsicles, you mean? Or ice cream? The first are frozen water, with sugar or fruit juice, the second is milk based. They're desserts. The _Copernicus _has a food synthesizer. I'm sure it has a program for them. How about it?"

It was the first smile he got from Tulok.

Someone screamed.

0000000000

Kirk found his situation not improved.

The crippling mental exhaustion that had sent him into a senseless sleep – he had no way of knowing how long that had lasted – had faded. None of them had come to harass him. But neither had Jody come.

The IV had not been replaced since his return to the sick bay. With Jody ignoring him he hadn't had any fluids after losing so much to his condition and break down. By his best guess he had been awake for twenty-four hours. At first he hadn't allowed himself to fall asleep because he wanted to be aware of what was happening. Now he was afraid to let himself drift toward the feverish exhaustion that was creeping up on him.

To make matters worse, his continuous position, lying on his back, strapped to the hard biobed, was giving him muscle cramps. But those, he knew, could also be a symptom of severe dehydration. So were the dry heat on his skin and the headache and nausea, very different from the oxalica poisoning.

He yanked the restraints. They still had no give. His wrists were chafed from trying.

"Jody!" he yelled hoarsely.

No one. He knew they were there, he could hear them moving in the corridor.

He kicked the bed as much as the ankle restraints allowed. The biobed alarm, already going at a low moan, blipped. He kicked again to keep his circulation going and ease the cramps racking his back, his legs and shoulders. The effort made his heart beat too fast and caught at his already shallow and rapid breathing.

Were they monitoring him? He lifted himself on his elbows and scanned the room for the so-manieth time, looking for a camera.

No, the situation had not improved.

He fell back against the bed, sending a jolt of pain through his neck and head. The panel above the bed bleeped a more alarming note.

_Ah._

He lifted his head and banged it against the head rest. Then he did it again. Tiny specks of light started flooding his vision.

_Again. Again_.

The alarm was deafening to his ears but he could no longer trust his senses.

_Again_.

Had someone entered? His eyes were squeezed shut.

_Ag-_

Hands were pushing down on his forehead.

"Stop it!" Jody yelled. "Stop it, you idiot!"

His head was being turned and a hypo hissed at his neck.

He opened his eyes.

Tulok was there. Staring.

_No!_

0000000000

Risa's scream was cut off by a loud bang, a shot from an old-fashioned rifle.

Kirk turned around when he heard the scream but now he dropped down to the ground. Tulok immediately did the same. Kirk instinctively touched his chest, but found no communicator there.

He cursed. All their portable equipment had been left behind when they beamed down to Azara, which guarded its technological status quo closely. Phasers too, of course. Now the incongruous sound of an explosive pressure rifle made sense. Because it didn't emit radiation and was easily disassembled, it would have escaped the Azaran border officials' scrutiny.

Motioning for Tulok to stay own, he raised himself on one knee and looked up over the flowers, which stood tall enough to conceal him totally when at a crouch.

Five men, moving in a tightening half circle. Where were the children? The field was quiet but for the rebound of the gunshot rushing away from them.

"C-Captain?"

Kirk and Tulok jerked around. Children, lots of children. They must have followed them. Kirk sought the oldest one among the frightened faces. He found Gavin, the other kid who had come with him on the _Copernicus_.

Kirk opened his mouth to speak but his words were stolen by the sudden hellish wailing of many children in the distance. The children around Kirk cowered, and a general whimpering broke out.

"Shh-shh, it's going to be alright," Kirk hushed. He pretended not to hear the next two shots and the noticeable lessening of the children's cries.

"Gavin, how many are you?" he asked urgently.

Gavin made a quick inventory and confirmed Kirk's count.

"T-twelve. Ms. Risa is still there, with the littlest ones."

_So, Risa and ten children. He with Tulok and Gavin and twelve children. Assuming Risa and two children were dead, altogether twenty-eight of them in the field._

Another shot. Another. Another. Deafening. The ground shook, the air vibrated with high-pitched screams. He wanted to do what the kids were doing, stop his ears with his fingers, screw his eyes shut. But he counted the shots. _Six_. When finally their rebounds had drifted away over the field, the wailing had stopped.

_Oh God. _

Kirk wanted to close his eyes and take just a moment of respite to think this through. Instead he raised himself on a knee again. The five men were moving. Their web was tightening around their group. One of them stood still.

"Kirk!"

_Royal!_

Kirk ducked and turned to the children.

_Fourteen. How many could fit in the Copernicus? _

"Tulok, Gavin. Take the children to the shuttle. It's unlocked."

He hesitated. He knew the oldest kids could navigate their school shuttle, which now lay unattainable behind enemy lines. He tried to remember if its controls were similar to the ones in the _Copernicus_.

"There's an auto-pilot-" he offered desperately.

"-I saw you operate it on the way over," Gavik said, "I-I think I can do it."

Kirk nodded gratefully.

"Come with us!" Tulok pleaded.

Kirk shook his head. He wouldn't fit. And the shuttle would take precious seconds to charge up. And Royal wasn't really after the children. Royal was here because of him_. _

"Now, kids," he spoke fast but with as much calm confidence as he could simulate, "everyone stay _down, _keep_ quiet_, and move _fast_. Take off immediately, Gavin, Tulok. First get away from here and then contact the city. Can you work the communication panel?"

Both boys nodded emphatically.

The men were getting closer. Kirk could hear them talking to each other.

"Go," Kirk whispered. "I'll see you in the city."

The group moved away, Gavin up front, Tulok in the rear. The boy glanced back at him, then disappeared into the thick grass.

Kirk thought fast.

_Assuming they're good shots, Risa and eight dead. Fourteen on their way to the shuttle. Two little ones in the field somewhere, hopefully lying low. Royal and four men. Me._

00000000000

"We're supposed to _what_!" McCoy yelled.

The Doctor's outburst irritated Spock, but he could see that Admiral Faulk – on screen again, live this time - seemed to understand. The Admiral held out his hands in the universal gesture of peace, and the Doctor stilled himself with a deep breath.

"Control is entirely in Faradan's hands, Doctor," Faulk explained. "He calls the shots-sorry, bad choice of words," he added when he saw McCoy blanch. He sighed. "He asked for you two in particular, said that's Jim's request. The fog on Rexis Two is laced with subatomic uralium particles, which makes it impenetrable to our sensors or transporter, _and _theirs. You will land the shuttle at the appointed coordinates and take Royal into the fog. Your only guide will be the compass. You will go straight north, they from their landing point will go straight south. It will be a long walk, and you should stay on target the entire time. Then you meet in the middle. Faradan said he knew his son would be drugged, and specified that Jim would be too. Two of you bring in Royal, two of them bring in Jim. You make the exchange. No weapons allowed."

"And we're supposed to trust him?" McCoy protested.

"We can on that count, Doctor," said Spock . "Even the smallest struggle would displace the parties. This would throw of our return trajectories and we would never find our shuttles in the fog."

"That's what _he_ said," stated Faulk. "Then you shuttle in opposite directions. The _Enterprise _will wait on the day side of the planet, his vessel will wait on the night side. By the time any party has boarded their ship and navigated it to the other side of the planet, the other can be gone."

"An admirable plan," Spock said. "He matched our vulnerabilities. Even in the last step of his plan it makes sense for both of us to navigate away. We have the superior ship in battle, but they have the Morrow transporter."

"When are we supposed to do this?" McCoy interrupted him gruffly.

"In twenty hours, Doctor," said the Admiral.

"And how do we know, Admiral," McCoy snapped, "that Jim will be there, alive? He's been through two Morrow jumps already and God knows how many more. And we know they are ruthless, hell, they _live_ on inflicting pain! Considering the state Jim was in when they took him-oh, don't remind me of what I said in Shore's office. He was ready for command, not _this!_"

"If we arrive at the meeting point and the Captain is not there," Spock stressed for the Doctor's benefit, "there will obviously be no exchange. And then all the other constraints of the plan kick in. It is true that Faradan isn't reasonable, Doctor, as in he has lost his moral judgment. But he is still goal-driven – to retrieve his son – and logical, _unfeelingly logical_. "

Spock steeled himself, but again the Doctor remained silent.

"I assure you, Doctor McCoy," he continued, not caring that his voice betrayed feeling. "The Captain will be there."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

The kids were small and stealthy, but moving as a group they would be seen. He looked up again and plotted his course, aiming to get as close as possible to the attacker on the left.

He ran, staying as close to the ground as he could. A shot rang and a bullet flew over him. Good, they would concentrate on him now. He readjusted his trajectory and sped up. He came upon the man almost unexpectedly.

He certainly hadn't expected it and Kirk tackled him with ease. He knocked him down, then out, grabbed the riffle, and moved away in one fluid motion. When he glanced back, up over the grasses, he couldn't see the others. They had gone under as well. He ducked.

_Where? Where?_

He looked up and saw the shuttle taking off against the clear blue sky. It was top-heavy, sluggish, but airborne and _moving_.

They started shooting at it, but Kirk knew the shuttle would deflect the bullets. Tearing his eyes off the wonderful sight, he concentrated instead on where the firing was coming from.

"Hold your fire!" someone yelled, and the field went quiet once more.

_Seven_. _Seven in the field._

He hoped.

What if the children hadn't all fit? If they hadn't, the ones left behind would need his help. He had a riffle now.

He started moving again, back towards where the shuttle had taken off.

0000000000

"Why did you do that?"

Kirk's head felt like hell, and he was still running a fever, and he was tired to the bone. But at least the IV was back in place, and he was sitting up in the bed, with only loose wrist restraints, and Jody was again talking to him.

"I assumed you want to exchange me _alive_, so I called that to your attention," he quipped weakly.

"You're an idiot," she whispered.

Her half-smile was complex. He waited for her to take the lead.

"I am sorry," she said finally. "I'm sorry for abandoning you, but I hated you for what you said. No, not for what you said, but for saying it to me too. No-oh, _damnit!_" her eyes filled with tears, and she turned away.

Kirk didn't look away while giving her the time she needed to regain control.

"That's not true either," she finally whispered, wiping the rolling tears off her cheeks with the palms of her hands. "Jim, I hate _myself_. You are right, we _are _monsters. Me too, me too!"

"Then don't do this," he said, not even trying to hide his desperation. He had lost her like this once, but he figured he had nothing to lose now. He knew the exchange was imminent, and however much he wanted to get out of here, the thought of being the means of Royal's release made him sick to his stomach.

"He'll go on killing, Jody," he went on, pleading with her. "He has killed _children_. Three-year-olds, Jody. He will fall even deeper. You heard Will: 'a _ruler_ of the Universe'! With the Morrow transporter and without a conscience what is to stop him from blowing up an entire space station, enslaving a planet-Jody!"

Hindered by the restraints he grabbed beside her arm when she stood up and stepped away from him.

She stood there for a few seconds, out of his reach.

"I know it, Jim," she said simply.

He couldn't decipher the look she gave him, a look of such desperate longing it made his heart skip a beat.

She walked out of the room and left him to drift back into a shallow slumber.

00000000000

It was one of the little ones. He had stumbled upon one of the stray children. The little girl, barely four years old by his experience of Earth children, lay curled up in a small ball. Just her tiny back and the back of her head were visible, and the bottoms of her little feet sticking out. As her hair was the typical Azaran blonde and her summer dress was also a neutral yellow, she was well concealed.

He wanted to run away from her to deflect the attacker who was very nearby. But she had seen him and was looking at him with eyes filling with hope. If he left her, she would start crying and betray herself. And the attacker was too close.

Closer than he thought.

He spun around on his knee, aiming his rifle. Too late. The other's shot exploded in his chest. The impact slamming him backwards even as the bullet exited between his shoulder blades. The incredible surge of adrenaline in his veins pulled the trigger of his rifle for him, right before he hit the ground.

It was a direct hit to the head. The man yanked backwards, his feet jumping, his spine snapping, and he was down.

Kirk dropped the rifle and instinctively brought his hands to the wound. He gasped and curled up with the pain as the air was released into his chest cavity and his right lung collapsed. Then blood started to saturate his shirt, front and back.

Biting down and cursing between clenched teeth, Kirk rolled over toward the girl.

Her face was blown away by the bullet that had gone through him.

_That's when he loses it. _

His mind contracted to only one thought.

_Move._

The other stray child could be near and the other attackers were now coming toward him. Yelling with rage and pain, spitting blood, he pushed himself off onto his hands and knees. He looked down at the blood that was dripping out of the hole in his chest into rivulets among the crushed grass and flowers. Each breath was an agony. Yet he got himself moving, continuing in the direction of the shuttle's point of departure.

They were close.

_Five. Five in the field. Please, God, only five in the field._

000000000000

"Ready to go home, Jimmy?" Aaron scoffed.

Jody was practically shielding him with her body, deliberately placing herself in between him – still strapped to the bed - and Billy. Again Kirk got a glimpse of the explosiveness of the situation. He tightened, readying himself to jump them, now more out of protectiveness for Jody than for his own sake.

Then Jody turned around.

"I'm so very sorry, Jim," she whispered. She set the hypo ready against his neck. "One more jump."

"No!"

A blue light filled the sick bay and the hypo released its dreaded cocktail of Radicals and oxalica. The world turned to soup.

000000

It was like bobbing up out of water. He sucked in air and his condition stabilized somewhat. Again his elbows were tied behind his back and he was being dragged out of the sickbay by Aaron and Billy. The jump must have knocked him out for only a minute or two.

In the course of a brief and pathetic struggle he ascertained that it had weakened him as badly as his first two jumps, probably in combination with his exhaustion and dehydration. The nausea and headache were less, but he was not thankful for that. He knew it meant that his body was already starting to accommodate the surges of oxalica.

Still, his senses worked, he was alert, and he could even lift his head a bit. He didn't remember this corridor from his last and only conscious jaunt around the vessel. A door opened and he looked up to see a small shuttle craft. Will Faradan was waiting for him near the hatch.

Jody quickly overtook them and ran inside the craft. The brothers followed with Kirk.

"She and I will go," Faradan barked when they had crossed the threshold.

They flung Kirk down in dissent. Unable to control the fall the only thing he could do for himself was to keep his head from hitting the deck by taking the fall on his shoulder. Gasping with the pain and a lurch of nausea, he still heard Aaron's protest,

"At least let _me_ go! What good will _she _be if it's a trap!"

Jody knelt next to him and started pulling him fully into the vessel.

"Listen, _son_," Faradan commanded, and the authority in his voice sent a shudder up Kirk's spine. "He's in no condition to be beaten up by you two. Take it up with your brother when he gets back!"

With one deft movement Faradan shoved his sons out of the shuttle and pressed the panel to close the hatch. The brothers had no choice but to jump out of the way. Faradan stepped over Kirk and Jody and hurried to the helm.

The sweeping flash of red lights told Kirk that the bay was opening onto space.

He looked over at Tulok, who was sitting cross-legged in the corner.

"Look_,_ Tulok, it's _space!_"

The boy made no response.

Jody's hand touched his forehead. It felt too cold, and he finally realized that he was burning up. He felt so very, very tired.

"Rest," Jody said. "We have a long walk ahead of us."

00000000000

He knew Royal and the other two – not his brothers – were playing a cat-and-mouse game with him. His progress to the shuttle's landing and take-off point was excruciatingly slow and his blood trail was easy to find and follow. They could have caught up with him ten minutes ago. But instead of putting him out of his misery they let him crawl through the grass, gushing blood, trembling with pain and the lack of oxygen.

He couldn't quite understand why. To mess with him, to drag it out, yes. But surely they knew that Tulok and Gavin would have contacted the city. It would take a rescue team only twenty-five to thirty minutes to get here.

_How long has it been?_

Convulsing with one more gasp of breath he finally reached the rocky outcropping. The sound of footsteps on grit penetrated the haze of his pain. They were right behind him, _walking_ along. But he didn't care. He looked up. There was no one. No more children.

_Five in the field._

Exhausted he hit the ground.

A boot came down right in front of his face.

"Look again, Jim. Look over there."

_What does he mean?_

He tried to lift his head but no longer had any strength left. Two pairs of hands grabbed him roughly by his shoulders and dragged him a couple of yards further up the rock.

He still couldn't lift his head but in a shoe appeared in the corner of his vision.

_No_.

They dropped him next to the boy, in the exact same position, on their stomachs, arms pinned to their sides, faces turned toward each other in the dust. Only a foot apart.

_Six in the field._

Tulok was still conscious. Blood was spilling out of his mouth and nose, running down his cheek and chin. His eyes were wide open, holding fast to Kirk's gaze with their clarity.

"There wasn't enough room," he sighed.

_Five._

He registered only faintly the sensation of cold steel pressing into his temple. He took one last breath into his body and then spent it all on a question.

"Why?"

Someone laughed.

_Four. _

_Four in the field of flowers._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

He was happy for the sudden chill when the shuttle hatch opened. Faradan loomed over him, regarding him with a doleful eye.

"Give him something," Faradan said.

Jody gave him an injection and he felt the surge of energy. They helped him stand up and he tried to support himself as best he could as they started out.

For a long time, initially, he thought the fog was in his mind. Then he realized it wasn't. It seemed to make Jody and Faradan nervous, and Faradan kept stopping and consulting a box, which turned out to be a compass.

He didn't know how long they walked, stumbled and fell on the flat terrain that for all he knew was a strip of land in between two endless chasms. The fog was dense and moved in spooky forms by a breeze that at times waxed to a driving wind.

The drug started to wear off. He started thinking he was back in the Field of Flowers on Azara, being dragged to Tulok who lay dying. He began to struggle. Faradan cursed and let him fall to the ground.

"He was already hallucinating during the shuttle ride," Jody said, leaning over him protectively.

He felt his bonds being cut and moaned with the painful freedom of his arms, shoulders and neck. He got another shot in the neck – less effective this time – and Jody and Faradan lifted him up again, hooking his arms over their shoulders.

"You're almost home, Jim," Jody pleaded.

Her face was very close to him and when he looked at her his eyes focused. Then he stood, of sorts, and nodded.

They started moving again.

0000000

"Spock!"

Spock had already seen them approaching in the fog. At ten yards' distance, the group fragmented into three figures.

"Doctor!" he warned, "don't move from the trajectory!"

McCoy stopped in his tracks. He had been navigating by their compass a few steps ahead of Spock and his burden, the semi-conscious Royal Faradan in a fireman's hold over the Vulcan's slim but incredibly strong shoulder. He peered at the group ten yards away and cursed when strands of fog floated in, shrouding the trio. It was all he could do not to break into a run.

Then the fog parted and he saw that they too had halted. He recognized William Faradan and Royal's wife, Jody Faradan. And Jim in between them.

"Stay where you are, Mister Spock!" Faradan yelled. "The Doctor will bring Royal and Jody will bring your Captain! No tricks!"

McCoy handed Spock the compass and received the bulk of Royal Faradan, who outweighed the Doctor by thirty pounds and did little to help their combined balance. Off they lurched, aiming for the other duo. Though they were still mere silhouettes in the fog, McCoy could see that Jody was a small woman and was equally having trouble with Kirk, who moved like he was drugged. But as long as Spock and Faradan didn't move and as long as they stayed within visual range, they could sway all they wanted.

As they approached and the fog between them became thinner, McCoy's alarm exploded. Kirk wasn't just drugged. His face was deadly pale except for the flushed cheekbones. His eyes were sunken, his lips cracked. His breathing was shallow and halting. But most worrying were his eyes, glassy and empty, like there was no one there.

"Jim!" McCoy cried out, letting go of Royal.

Jody in turn didn't reach for Royal, who landed with a thud and a moan. Instead she held Kirk until the Doctor had him securely.

"What have you done to him!" McCoy swore, struggling to keep a firm grip on Kirk. He could feel the wild flutter of his heart, the heat of his body.

"He has a high fever," Jody said urgently, "because his body is withdrawing from the oxalica, and he's dehydrated- -Doctor!"

McCoy had already started back toward Spock. The anguish in her voice made him stop and look at her over his shoulder.

"Please tell him I'll make it right."

McCoy nodded and moved on.

0000000

Spock helped McCoy lay the Captain on the ground for a quick checkup. Kirk was delirious, repeating a word over and over again. McCoy leaned closer.

"What is he saying, Doctor?" asked Spock.

"_Four_? Or _flower_. Either _four_ or _flower_. We need to get him to the _Enterprise_. I'll navigate. Quickly, Spock!"

Spock lifted the Captain up and over his shoulder.

They hardly looked back at the Faradan.

0000000

The Doctor and Nurse Chapel were arranging the Captain on the biobed, hooking him up to an IV and a respirator. Spock was glad for the Doctor's confident decision making, his sure and quick movements. There was none of the blood and none of McCoy's anguish, like last time. Spock knew the Captain would make it.

He turned away and pressed a button next to the screen in the wall.

"How far are we from the planet, Mister Sulu?"

"Twenty-two light years, Mister Spock. The Faradan vessel is moving away as well, as planned."

With the turn of the dial Spock turned on the aft view and magnified. The Faradan ship was moving fast, and he half expected her to jump into thin air again.

Instead, she burst into ball of light.

"She blew up!" came Sulu's shocked cry. "Mister Spock, she blew up!"

McCoy joined Spock in front of the screen and caught the last contraction of the bright explosion.

"She told me," the Doctor said excitedly, as if suddenly remembering. "Jody Faradan. She asked me to tell Jim. That she would make it right."

0000000

McCoy was informed by a quiet _bleep_ from his panel that the Captain had woken up. He walked to the one-way window in his office and to see Kirk blink. He didn't run out to join him. Something in Jim's face held him back.

Then Kirk did a strange thing. He made the effort – the Doctor's panel _bleeped,_ loud and clear, the effort it cost the patient – of lifting his head and quickly, almost furtively scanning the room. McCoy frowned at the strange mixture of fear and longing that was plain on his friend's face.

Jim stopped at a corner, then smiled at something that was not there. If anything, it was that mischievous smirk of old that startled the Doctor, rooting him to his spot.

Jim's eyes closed in pain – the panel _bleeped_ louder - and his head fell back against the headrest.

McCoy hurried into the room.

"It's okay. The headache is part of the oxalica withdrawal. But you're nearly there."

Kirk panicked at the sight of the hypospray and tried to slap it away. The movement was so slow and weak McCoy caught his hand and brought it down with ease while injecting the drug.

"It's a mild painkiller," he explained softly. "You're on the _Enterprise. _You're safe."

"I'll never be safe," murmured Kirk with a sad resignation that broke McCoy's heart.

"It's all over, Jim," the Doctor countered with emotion. "Their ship exploded as they pulled away from the planet. I think she did it, Jody Faradan. She told me to tell you that she'd make it right. You're safe now, they can't come after you again."

The unchanged look on Kirk's face told the Doctor that his answer had missed the mark.

"What is it, Jim?" he asked gently.

"A popsicle," said Kirk.

"What?"

"A blue popsicle in the shape of a space rocket, blueberry flavor. Can you swing it, Bones?"

Had Jim lost his mind? He seemed fully awake now. Still a bit melancholy, but so hopeful McCoy couldn't refuse the request, couldn't even bring himself to question it. He walked over to the sick bay food synthesizer. It took him a minute to locate the program, then brought the result, already dripping onto a little paper plate, over to the patient.

"You're not going to eat this, are you?" he asked uncertainly.

Kirk laughed with genuine happiness. It was shortlived, and quickly drained him, but McCoy found himself smiling along.

"No, Bones, no," Kirk shighed. "Put it there, will you, on the floor?"

He nodded at the corner of the room that had attracted his attention before. Apparently, he was still seeing something there.

McCoy complied.

When he looked up, the Captain was sound asleep.


End file.
